25 Secrets Your HR Clients Will Never (or Rarely) Tell You About Themselves…

by Alan Collins - http://successinhr.com As an HR professional, the better you understand both the noble and not-so-noble thoughts buried in your clients minds, the better you can serve them. Obviously, you’re not a mindreader.Nor do you play one on TV.So, here’s a list of 25 “less-than-loveable” secret TRUTHS you’ll never (or rarely) hear from your clients… 1. Deep down inside, it’s really all about ME. 2. I’ve worked hard to earn MY big title. MY life is really stressful and complicated. As my HR business partner, if you can help ME reduce that stress, make MY life easier or enable ME to get things done quicker, you become immensely valuable to ME. If you can’t, stay the hell away and don’t bother ME. 3. I don’t need you to be the best HR professional on the planet, but I do need to know I can rely on you. If you do exactly what you say you will do, consistently and without fail, then you’re a superstar in my eyes. 4. Having the guts to tell me that you DON’T know something makes me trust you. Just don’t do it too often. I look to you for options, alternatives and solutions — even if I decide not to follow any of them. 5. Although I don’t always tell you, when I’m facing a tough HR, employee relations or talent issue, having a calming and supportive voice like yours means more than you can imagine. 6. Even though I may tell you otherwise, I really don’t understand some of the e-mails you send me. Can you make them clearer and simpler? Can you drop the HR jargon and psychobabble and cut to the chase. 7. I want to trust you, but it’s hard for me to trust anyone. However, once you’ve won my trust and loyalty, the truth is you can screw up every now and then and I’ll forgive you. That is, if I don’t think you’re taking me for granted. 8. Yes, I’m a big shot in the organization, but I spend an awful lot of time being scared to death. Sometimes, I secretly feel like a lost little kid. I don’t admit it, but I want you to make me feel more secure with the tough, people-related decisions that I must make as a leader. 9. Sometimes I’m lousy at admitting I’m wrong. But I respect you when you do it. 10. You’re in HR. I’m your client. Though I like you, our relationship isn’t equal and it never will be. 11. I get crazy jealous if I find out that you’re are giving another one of your clients more value, more insights and more attention than you’re giving me. 12. I have no interest in hearing your excuses. In fact, when you offer them, though I may nod my head, it usually either annoys me or I don’t believe you. 13. I find myself endlessly fascinating. 14. When you’re pitching me on the company’s newest HR program, if it requires me to change rather than do it the old way, I need you to work harder at helping me justify it to myself. Deep down, while I believe in change, I don’t believe all change is good. 15. I love it when you share things with me about my team that I can brag about at a dinner party or to my boss. 16. I want you to do the hard work for me. And it’s even better if I can get all the credit. 17. I have the attention span of a gnat. Go too long without contacting me and I’ll simply forget you exist. Out of sight, out of mind…that is until I’m in trouble. Then I’ll wonder, where the hell you’ve been. 18. It infuriates me when you glance at your smart phone while I’m talking with you face-to-face – although it’s ok for me to do so. 19. I’m lazier than I would ever admit. 20. I’m more vain than I would ever admit. 21. I’m more insecure than I would ever admit. 22. Despite all that, I secretly think I’m smarter than most of the people in the organization. Help me believe that too and we’ll hit it off just fine. 23. I believe I deserve much more than I’m getting. 24. When it comes to getting the most from my people, I don’t always have the best answers or take the best approach – but I may not tell you. Somehow, you need to know how to get through to me when I’m wrong and help me figure out a better way. 25. I’m more selfish than I would ever admit. Like I said earlier, it really is ALL about me. Now, some items on this list might seem cynical, but they’re not.So, what’s the point of this list?The point is, it doesn’t matter what kind of clients you have. Like you and me, they’re human, with their own flaws and embarrassing insecurities. And the more you know…REALLY know…which of these25 secrets apply to your clients, the better you can POSITIONwhat you SAY or DO to gain their trust, their supportand their admiration as an HR professional. That’s the point. Having said that, do you agree? Disagree? Feel free to push back.

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10.11.2012 @ 18:50Current Revision
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<em><strong>by Alan Collins</strong></em> <h5>by Alan Collins - http://successinhr.com
As an HR professional, the better you understand both the noble and not-so-noble thoughts buried in your clients minds, the better you can serve them. As an HR professional, the better you understand both the noble and not-so-noble thoughts buried in your clients minds, the better you can serve them.
<img src="http://successinhr.com/ secrets.jpg" />  <img src="http://successinhr.com/ secrets.jpg" alt="" />
Obviously, you’re not a mindreader.  
Nor do you play one on TV.  
So, here’s a list of 25 “less-than-loveable” secret TRUTHS you’ll never (or rarely) hear from your clients…  Obviously, you’re not a mindreader.Nor do you play one on TV.So, here’s a list of 25 “less-than-loveable” secret TRUTHS you’ll never (or rarely) hear from your clients…
<strong>1.  Deep down inside, it’s really all about ME.</strong>  <strong>1. Deep down inside, it’s really all about ME.</strong>
<strong></strong>2. I’ve worked hard to earn MY big title.  MY life is really stressful and complicated.  As my HR business partner, if you can help ME reduce that stress, make MY life easier or enable ME to get things done quicker, you become immensely valuable to ME.  If you can’t, stay the hell away and don’t bother ME.  <strong>2. I’ve worked hard to earn MY big title.</strong> MY life is really stressful and complicated. As my HR business partner, if you can help ME reduce that stress, make MY life easier or enable ME to get things done quicker, you become immensely valuable to ME. If you can’t, stay the hell away and don’t bother ME.
&nbsp;  
<strong>3.  I don’t need you to be the best HR professional on the planet, but I do need to know I can rely on you.  If you do exactly what you say you will do, consistently and without fail, then you’re a superstar in my eyes.</strong>  <strong>3. I don’t need you to be the best HR professional on the planet, but I do need to know I can rely on you. If you do exactly what you say you will do, consistently and without fail, then you’re a superstar in my eyes.</strong>
4.  Having the guts to tell me that you DON’T know something makes me trust you.  Just don’t do it too often.  I look to you for options, alternatives and solutions — even if I decide not to follow any of them.<strong>   </strong>  <strong>4. Having the guts to tell me that you DON’T</strong> know something makes me trust you. Just don’t do it too often. I look to you for options, alternatives and solutions — even if I decide not to follow any of them.<strong> </strong>
<strong></strong><strong>5.  Although I don’t always tell you, when I’m facing a tough HR, employee relations or talent issue, having a calming and supportive voice like yours means more than you can imagine.</strong>  <strong>5. Although I don’t always tell you, when I’m facing a tough HR, employee relations or talent issue, having a calming and supportive voice like yours means more than you can imagine.</strong>
6.  Even though I may tell you otherwise, I really don’t understand some of the e-mails you send me.  Can you make them clearer and simpler?  Can you drop the HR jargon and psychobabble and cut to the chase.  <strong>6. Even though I may tell you otherwise,</strong> I really don’t understand some of the e-mails you send me. Can you make them clearer and simpler? Can you drop the HR jargon and psychobabble and cut to the chase.
<strong>7.  I want to trust you, but it’s hard for me to trust anyone.  However, once you’ve won my trust and loyalty, the truth is you can screw up every now and then and I’ll forgive you.</strong><strong>  That is, if </strong><strong>I don’t think you’re taking me for granted.</strong>  <strong>7. I want to trust you, but it’s hard for me to trust anyone. However, once you’ve won my trust and loyalty, the truth is you can screw up every now and then and I’ll forgive you.</strong><strong> That is, if </strong><strong>I don’t think you’re taking me for granted.</strong>
8.  Yes, I’m a big shot in the organization, but I spend an awful lot of time being scared to death.  Sometimes, I secretly feel like a lost little kid.  I don’t admit it, but I want you to make me feel more secure with the tough, people-related decisions that I must make as a leader.  8. Yes, I’m a big shot in the organization, but I spend an awful lot of time being scared to death. Sometimes, I secretly feel like a lost little kid. I don’t admit it, but I want you to make me feel more secure with the tough, people-related decisions that I must make as a leader.
9.  <strong>Sometimes I’m lousy at admitting I’m wrong.  But I respect you when you do it.</strong>  9. <strong>Sometimes I’m lousy at admitting I’m wrong. But I respect you when you do it.</strong>
10. You’re in HR.  I’m your client.  Though I like you, our relationship isn’t equal and it never will be.  10. You’re in HR. I’m your client. Though I like you, our relationship isn’t equal and it never will be.
<strong>11. </strong><strong>I get crazy jealous if I find out that you’re are giving another one of your clients more value, more insights and more attention than you’re giving me.</strong> <strong>11. </strong><strong>I get crazy jealous if I find out that you’re are giving another one of your clients more value, more insights and more attention than you’re giving me.</strong>
12. I have no interest in hearing your excuses. In fact, when you offer them, though I may nod my head, it usually either annoys me or I don’t believe you. 12. I have no interest in hearing your excuses. In fact, when you offer them, though I may nod my head, it usually either annoys me or I don’t believe you.
<strong>13.  </strong><strong>I find myself endlessly fascinating.</strong>  <strong>13. </strong><strong>I find myself endlessly fascinating.</strong>
14. When you’re pitching me on the company’s newest HR program, if it requires me to change rather than do it the old way, I need you to work harder at helping me justify it to myself.  Deep down, while I believe in change, I don’t believe all change is good.  14. When you’re pitching me on the company’s newest HR program, if it requires me to change rather than do it the old way, I need you to work harder at helping me justify it to myself. Deep down, while I believe in change, I don’t believe all change is good.
<strong>15.  </strong><strong>I love it when you share things with me about my team that I can brag about at a dinner party or to my boss.</strong>  <strong>15. </strong><strong>I love it when you share things with me about my team that I can brag about at a dinner party or to my boss.</strong>
16. I want you to do the hard work for me. And it’s even better if I can get all the credit. 16. I want you to do the hard work for me. And it’s even better if I can get all the credit.
<strong>17. </strong><strong>I have the attention span of a gnat.   Go too long without contacting me and I’ll simply forget you exist.  Out of sight, out of mind…that is until I’m in trouble.  Then I’ll wonder, where the hell you’ve been.</strong>  <strong>17. </strong><strong>I have the attention span of a gnat. Go too long without contacting me and I’ll simply forget you exist. Out of sight, out of mind…that is until I’m in trouble. Then I’ll wonder, where the hell you’ve been.</strong>
<strong></strong>18.  It infuriates me when you glance at your smart phone while I’m talking with you face-to-face – although it’s ok for me to do so.  <strong></strong>18. It infuriates me when you glance at your smart phone while I’m talking with you face-to-face – although it’s ok for me to do so.
<strong>19. </strong><strong>I’m lazier than I would ever admit.</strong> <strong>19. </strong><strong>I’m lazier than I would ever admit.</strong>
<strong></strong>20. I’m more vain than I would ever admit. <strong></strong>20. I’m more vain than I would ever admit.
<strong>21. </strong><strong>I’m more insecure than I would ever admit.</strong> <strong>21. </strong><strong>I’m more insecure than I would ever admit.</strong>
<strong></strong>22. Despite all that, I secretly think I’m smarter than most of the people in the organization.  Help me believe that too and we’ll hit it off just fine.  <strong></strong>22. Despite all that, I secretly think I’m smarter than most of the people in the organization. Help me believe that too and we’ll hit it off just fine.
<strong>23. </strong><strong>I believe I deserve much more than I’m getting.</strong> <strong>23. </strong><strong>I believe I deserve much more than I’m getting.</strong>
24. When it comes to getting the most from my people, I don’t always have the best answers or take the best approach – but I may not tell you.  Somehow, you need to know how to get through to me when I’m wrong and help me figure out a better way.  24. When it comes to getting the most from my people, I don’t always have the best answers or take the best approach – but I may not tell you. Somehow, you need to know how to get through to me when I’m wrong and help me figure out a better way.
<strong>25.  I’m more selfish than I would ever admit.  </strong><strong>Like I said earlier, it really is ALL about me.</strong>  <strong>25. I’m more selfish than I would ever admit. </strong><strong>Like I said earlier, it really is ALL about me.</strong>
Now, some items on this list might seem cynical, but they’re not.  
So, what’s the point of this list?  
The point is, it doesn’t matter what kind of clients you have.  Like you and me, they’re human, with their own flaws and embarrassing insecurities.  
<strong>And the more you know…REALLY know…which of these  
25 secrets apply to your clients, the better you can POSITION  
what you SAY or DO to gain their trust, their support  
and their admiration as an HR professional.</strong>  
  Now, some items on this list might seem cynical, but they’re not.So, what’s the point of this list?The point is, it doesn’t matter what kind of clients you have. Like you and me, they’re human, with their own flaws and embarrassing insecurities.
  <strong>And the more you know…REALLY know…which of these25 secrets apply to your clients, the better you can POSITIONwhat you SAY or DO to gain their trust, their supportand their admiration as an HR professional.</strong>
That’s the point. That’s the point.
Having said that, do you agree?  Disagree?  Feel free to push back.  Having said that, do you agree? Disagree? Feel free to push back.</h5>

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